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He didn't get where he is today by stealing somebody else's catchphrase.

Fraud

Whilst my leg injury continues to heal I have to take things easy. I'm training, albeit in a lesser capacity, but I have to be really careful about what I do or else I'll damage anything that's mended so far.

This brings me to the subject of exercise. Once upon a time, you would have had to lever me off the sofa with a crowbar to make me consider exercise, but for the last couple years it's been a pretty integral part of my life - especially during the last six months, as I've been running more and more. I'm no good at it, but that doesn't stop me from trying. I'm hardly built like a whippet.

After Christmas, I was trying to get back on track, gradually building up my running time by a minute per session into something respectable. Of course, this recent injury has set things back. Running is currently a bad thing. I can do it, but the impact wouldn't do me any favours, so it's back to the only safe form of exercise I can probably get away with at the moment - swimming.

Swimming pisses me off. Even though I'm the member of a gym, where we're free from screaming kamikaze kids, it still pisses me off. because unless there's less than about 5 people in the pool it becomes almost impossible to swim in a straight line. Unlike running, you can't listen to music - unless you have one of these. And then there's that last thing....

...swim up the pool...
...swim down the pool...
...swim up the pool...
...swim down the pool...

(Repeat until brain melts)

Bo-ring.

Finally, you get out of the pool - say, 50 lengths later. The truth is, you don't actually feel like you've done any exercise. Maybe it's just me, but when I say the words "exercise" and "swimming" in the same sentence, I feel like a fraud - like out-of-work actors who say they're "in between jobs". Perhaps this is because usually the pool is just filled with people cooling down after a real work-out and old people.

I'm running on Monday - even if my legs are falling off.
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