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He didn't get where he is today by stealing somebody else's catchphrase.

Slaps

Tomorrow, it's Father's Day. You probably already know this because most greeting card shops are constantly reminding you. It's strange though - the person you're buying the card for is a bloke, 50% of those people who buy cards are probably male too, so why is it so hard to buy a good bloke-ish greetings card?

To verify my point, you'll probably have noticed that most greetings cards seem to fall into the following categories:

i) "Happy Fathers Day, dearest Daddykins" - The card usually is covered with faux-cuddly bears, kittens or puppies. Any normal man would vomit on receiving this and only doesn't do so out of kindness to your feelings.

ii) "Happy Fathers Day, bald/stupid/lazy person" - These cards seems to insult you more than say thank-you, in the name of "humour".

iii) "Happy Fathers Day, golf/football/big car lover" - Unfortunately, there just aren't enough categories to pigeon-hole everyone sufficiently.

iv) The same cards you see at the rest of the year, re-badged with "Happy Fathers Day" at the top - These fundamentally lack any imagination whatsoever.

No. What we need is a company that can make blokes cards, from blokes, as this entire category seems to have been overlooked.

How about:

- "Happy Fathers Day, mate - want a pint?"
- Or "Many laddish back-slaps of the day"?

I think I might have discovered a new business idea...
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