He didn't get where he is today by stealing somebody else's catchphrase.


Every so often, I go on a purge. I pick a room, get ruthless and throw a lot of stuff out in the name of minimalism. I don't like clutter and after having grandparents who were descendants of magpies, I make a point of doing this every couple of months. This reassures me that it's not in the genes and I generally fill a few bin-bags with rubbish and stuff that's never going to be touched again - it's good for the soul. If I ever use the phrase,"That'll be useful sometime", that's the indicator that it won't and should go in the bag.

Today's area to be attacked was the loft. In there is a large crate filled with photographs. It weighs a bloody ton and was once affectionately referred to as the "travel box", containing a whole pile of crap that myself and my ex-wife picked up from our trips - photos, coins, flyers, newspapers - you name it, it's probably in there. Or, should I say, was.

When we used to travel a lot, we were (understandably) very trigger happy with the camera, thus generating a lot of pictures. It's just a shame they're all fucking awful pictures. Honestly, we couldn't take a decent picture to save our lives. Most are wonky. The remainder have appalling lighting, bad aim (I lost count at the amount of shots of a pavement or stomach), or were just plain shit. If the spirit of Mr Polaroid became aware of such abominations, he'd probably be turning in his grave like a doner kebab.

Nonetheless, whilst I filled a bag with a whole pile of photo-nasties, there were also some absolute gems that were so good that they really shouldn't be living in a box. It just doesn't seem right to only bring them out once every couple of years. They need some digital immortality.

Over the next couple of days, I shall grab my partner's scanner and give some of these photos a bit of a face lift, ready for a nostalgia-flavoured online photo-library, which I expect to have published by the end of the week. If you love bad hairstyles, mullets, moustaches and a bit of family history, you'll love it.

P.S. Knocked another 22 seconds off my 5k time - Now 33:20. Happy
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